18 June 2018... R.I.P. XXXTENTACION
I wanna start this post by telling you that this wasn't published on June 18, 2026, which was actually the release date I wanted for it, but I had eye surgery and I couldn't use my laptop to write, as a fan, I still want to dedicate this post to him and help keep XXXTENTACION's legacy alive, at least for the people who wanna read this and maybe don't know much about him.
This post is truly paying respect to x...
I always considered XXXTENTACION an artist in the purest meaning of the word, he didn't only create music, he created masterpieces by expressing his emotions and being real, he wasn't a perfect person, but he didn't care about all the bad energy around him, he was just vibing in his own way.
If you don't know about him, XXXTENTACION is currently one of the most streamed artists in Spotify history, with more than 35 billion streams and over 54 million followers on Spotify. That's huge.
He has banger songs like Moonlight, Fuck Love, Hope and Look at Me!
For me, my story with x is a little different, I discovered him when he was still alive, I remember that a few days before his death I watched the official video for SAD! because I heard the news around him, that was my first time seriously listening to his music and... I didn't like it hehehe.
I didn't get it. 😅 The beat and the lyrics didn't click with me until years later.
When I started listening to Juice WRLD, I began researching more about him and eventually discovered the connection between them, the way they started, and the emotions they poured into their music, the same thing happened with Lil Peep, basically, XXXTENTACION, Juice WRLD and Lil Peep dominated the SoundCloud era.
x started alongside Ski Mask the Slump God, they met each other in a juvenile detention center in South Florida, where they were both from.
x didn't want to make music like the rest of the artists, he wanted to put all of his feelings into his songs, from the very beginning, he showed the kind of music he always imagined creating, screaming with all his lungs just to transmit the exact feeling he wanted.
x and Ski Mask recorded some of their first songs at Ski Mask's grandmother's house and a lot of his early bangers were recorded with a Blue Snowball microphone, one of those songs was Look at Me!, made with a really looooow budget setup, that's one of the reasons why I think he's truly a GOAT.
Unfortunately, x lived through some traumatic experiences that are honestly heartbreaking... one of them was Jocelyn Flores...
She was a good friend of x that he met on Twitter, and unfortunately she took her own life after a situation that happened while she was around him, I'll talk more about her in my Jocelyn Flores review because there's a lot to discuss there.
When I finally clicked with x was around 2 years ago, I finally understood his music and became a loyal fan since then, actually, it happened around this same month.
The funny thing is that I didn't want to give his music a real chance at first because I knew I was probably going to love it, at that point I had already heard some of his songs and honestly, I just never gave him the opportunity even though I knew his music was exactly the kind of music I like hahaha, I'm a weirdo xD
And I have to admit it...
The song that finally clicked for me was HEARTEATER
Such a masterpiece.
Since then, it's been my favorite song from X.
I feel sorrow for him because he went through so much in his life. Gangs, fights, drugs and many other problems.
Before he died, he was trying to change... and even has a kid...
He started supporting the people around him, back then he was a close friend of Billie Eilish and he told her that one of his biggest fears was losing the people he loved.
Billie commented that he frequently asked her if she was okay and genuinely cared about her.
I know Billie dedicated songs to X, but honestly I haven't listened to them carefully enough yet, so I won't mention them, for me it's not only about listening to music, it's about paying attention, trying to understand the feelings behind it and processing the song.
That's actually what happened to me with x
Guardian Angel, one of the most beautiful and at the same time devastating songs he ever made, and was a song I didn't like at first, I didn't understand it...
But once you understand Jocelyn Flores, you realize that Guardian Angel is basically the reverse of it, it talks about the damage that her death left in him and how, if he could, he would be her guardian angel.
Man... that song hits really hard when you know the story behind it, you can feel how broken X was, and the song itself feels broken too, that's why I consider him the true definition of an artist.
X died on June 18, 2018... he was murdered, I don't want to talk much more about his death, I only want to say, with all the respect that I have for him...
R.I.P. X
It's actually curious because he became famous while he was in prison, when he got out, his music was already becoming extremely popular around the world, and while he was in prison he was mentally preparing what would become Look at Me!
R.I.P. to X and all the fallen ones...
I'm posting this together with 4 reviews, each one focused on a different song and album:
Later I'll post my Jocelyn Flores review because I really want to go deep into that song.
I can honestly recommend giving his music a try.
Maybe you're at a point in your life where you feel lost, abandoned, heartbroken, angry or uncertain.
Songs like these can sometimes help you keep moving forward, we don't know when our lives will end, all the bad energy around you... don't give a shit about it, surround yourself with good people and try to find the path that lets you enjoy your life the most.
That's what I think X wanted, and it's a message I want to share with you too.
To finish this post, I also want to keep alive the memory of Oliver Tree, Gaspi and all the people involved 💔
Damn... I admired both of them, I actually have several Oliver Tree songs that I genuinely like, and Gaspi...
Man, I found out about him around 3 years ago and when a friend first told me about what happened, I didn't believe it because I had been disconnected from almost all social media for a week.
But damn...
R.I.P. bros.
Sometimes life is so unpredictable and such a bitch, appreciate what you have around you.
And just like X told Juice in his last Instagram message...
Take care of the people you love.
